The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion The Witch And The Wardrobe (2005)

The Chronicles of Narnia is a film that couldn’t have been made in the 20th century effectively – it relies so heavily on special effects and digital tricks that even attempting to make it without all the digital trickery would have resulted in a B-film, regardless of its budget. With his experience as the special effects guy on several of the Batman films, director and producer Andrew Adamson did manage to put together one hell of a display. With all the visual do-goodery in place, and one of the best stories ever told to drive it forward, there wasn’t a lot to make the Witch and the Wardrobe fail… And of course, it doesn’t. [Read more…]

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Wonder Woman (2017 USA)

Mainstream films get dumber, louder and tackier all the time, and they substitute mawkishness for real emotion and character development. Banned in Lebanon, but to really do it justice this pile of crap should be banned everywhere! WW is really the same as every other cartoonish, overblown comic-book action flick, except with a female protagonist. Actually, this is worse than the average comic book movie, because it preaches to the audience about pacifism but then hypocritically celebrates “heroic” violence. In other words: Wonder Woman is an alleged pacifist who enjoys killing lots of  people. But wait!, all is not lost, WW delivers on three things – lots of slow mo, dodgy special effects, and painful clichés. [Read more…]

Deep Blue Sea (1999 USA)

saffron burrows“Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I shall fear no evil. For thou art with me. Thy rod and thy staff, they comfort me. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life. Because I carry a big stick and I’m the meanest m****r f****r in the valley! Two sharks down, Lord! One demon fish to go! Can I get an Amen?” Thus spake L.L. Cool J. With so many shark films out there, there needs to be something that sets a flick apart from the rest. For as many good points that Deep Blue Sea achieves, its mediocrities end up sinking a lot of good will. Director Renny Harlin knew that audiences wanted several things: 1) good-looking sharks 2) creative shark attacks 3) good-looking actors… [Read more…]

THE HOBBIT: The Battle Of The Five Armies (Film Review)

Hobbit-The-Battle-Of-The-Five-Armies1-e1406558769186This may just be Jackson’s most ambitious film yet. It has to work as a standalone film, it has to be the final part of a trilogy, and it has to be the bridge between The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings films. Ambitious? A mere quarter of a billion dollars was spent on this. [Read more…]

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