Holy Smoke (1999 Australia)

The bad news: That filthy old lecher Harvey Keitel is naked. A lot. (I thought I was in hell enduring root canal surgery when this was happening…telling myself this can’t be happening!) Now the good news: So is Kate Winslet. So don’t get me wrong, there is much to see that might arouse a smile in this motion picture. But if you are looking for any redeeming value, enjoyment or creativity, then don’t waste two hours out of your life on this crap fest. Despite commendable acting from the film’s main actress, Harvey Keitel looks embarrassingly like an amateur in a high school drama. Quite strange considering she was only 23 and he was a whopping 60. In fact, why don’t I just shine a light on many of the problems and just plain perversity contained within this flick from the land down under? [Read more…]

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A Free Short Story

KOORANGA COUNTRY

min-min-lights_queensland_australiaIn the north west of Australia, above the Simpson desert, it is said the desert heat can become so intense that it causes hallucinations as real as anything physical for the sufferer. The unfortunate victim never recovers their nervous system.

Emmanuel Vincent, real estate mogul extraordinaire, a man plagued with poor impulse control and stress, was finally doing what he had told his shocked wife and colleagues back in Gemini Bay, England.

He was on a mission into the outback. Ten thousand miles from home. [Read more…]

Not An Argument

May as well put up another video. This time its a very short exchange between the late Christopher Hitchens and an Australian/Iranian woman. I notice that she is wearing a figure-hugging top, exposing her arms and no head scarf. Despite her rambling fatuous argument about the Koran guarantees so many rights for women, she knows very well she could not dress like that in Tehran while being allowed to shout out arguments to men in public. In Iran women aren’t even allowed to expose their hair online! The police over there have arrested models for doing such a thing. Maybe this explains hypocritical ladies like this one, who enjoy all the freedoms (including that of public debate) of the West but still have that whining defensiveness about their cultural origins. I guess blood is thicker than water. If this woman enjoys so many rights in her country of origin then why does she live in Australia?

The Coca-Cola Kid (1985 USA)

YooniqImages_102407030  Ooh you handsome devil! Julia, eat your heart out.

(This review is in no way sponsored by Coca Cola or the Coca Cola bottling company) Now that’s out of the way… Strewth! Gidday mate and put another shrimp on the barbie etc. This is the ugly face of American Imperialism. When company trouble-shooter Becker (Eric Roberts) declares, “The world will not be truly free until Coke is available everywhere,” he’s speaking without irony. We have been warned. This story is about Becker’s attempts to help Coca-Cola colonize Australia, 198os – style. [Read more…]

Blue Water White Death (1971 USA) Film Review

sharm-shark-white-_1779070cCarcharodon carcharias. What a great name! What a terrible beauty God gave to this creature. No other being on the planet glides with the symmetry of the shark. Great White variety or otherwise. The nine months it took to  shoot this documentary was ground breaking back in 1969-70. What an experience it must have been to see this unique documentary on the big screen. If you are a shark fan you must buy this DVD. [Read more…]

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